sch's starting in 6 days,
i'm really looking forward to seing all my frens and classmates again
but somehow, after reading mar's post,
some of the excitement seems to have faded away.
cos though i feel almost as excited as i was when i first enter j1,
i noe that j2 will not be as carefree as j1 life.
it's much more stressful and university and your future job prospects all become so near.
though i've tried thinking abt it b4,
wad i really wanted to do next time,
i couldn't seem to make a decision.
it's like i like math,
but wad can i do with math in future?
a mathematician? i'm not tt zai to be one.
wad else? an accountant? the course i'm taking now doesn't allow me to be one.
as for phy and chem, the sciences i'm taking now,
engineering? neh, my phy is too noob.
chemistry-related stuff, tt's like the only thing i can strive towards.
lol
econs is definitely out of the qn, i dun like to argue abt stuff tt i'm not even interested in.. boo.. hahaha
once sch reopens, it's lects tutorials and tests all over again.
but i'm getting used to this system.
tt's probly only bcos i was getting used to the seating arrangements.
but now everything's shifted again, i'm not sure if i can adjust to it once more.
):

i realised tt i dun really like changes.
from pre-school to pri 1, i cried and told my mother tt i dun wanna change sch.
not tt i was v gd frens with any of my pre-school frens, i dun think i even noe majority of their names, but it's the change of envt, class, the meeting of new pple tt scares me.
rrahh i'm anti-social.
it appears tt i always need to have someone to "pave" the way for me into a new envt.
in pri 1-3, i was initially this loner,then a grp of 2 frens came to talk to me, i always wondered wad made them do tt :)
the same thing happens for p4 and p5, esp p5, when it got quite lonely even for me when i saw so many pple playing and eating tgt, having fun tgt.
then an amazing grp of frens came along and they kindly bring me into their circle of frenship, i was grateful, i still am :D
wad i'm sad to say is tt, we're not as close to each other anymore,
though we do wave and say hi to each other, you can sense some strange vibes that weren't there last time.
i hope tt smugglers will nvr be reduced to tt!
promise me k?
:)

this is probly the first serious post i've blogged this yr.
the rest of the other posts are more like telling stories and having fun than writing a diary
which is wad, i realise, a blog is for.
though it's not v private, is the place where you can stop repressing yourself and just express yourself the way you want.
i'm sure there won't be another serious post in quite awhile,
it sure is tiring thinking so hard everytime you blog.
i blog for the fun, for the connection with my frens and for the occasional outlet of feelings for me.
lol and of cos, blogging also allows me to show my frens who i'm crazy over!
LOL L and Arron Yan!! JJ appears in my MSN!
WAHAHAH
lol
ok i shall stop b4 i destroy the mood of this post.
:D